A Message To My Babies

‘A message to my babies’

‘How do I say goodbye,
I can’t,
I never even had the chance.

How do I move on,
I can’t,
I don’t even want to think of that.

How do I make peace with it,
Not knowing how you are each day,
I can’t.

I wonder every day,
Each time I see a child,
Each time I watch them play,
Each time I want a hug,
Each time I want to say,
I love you,
I miss you,
Each and every day.

There’s not one minute that goes by,
When you’re not here in my thoughts.

Your always in my heart,
This is why I won’t let go,
I won’t let this part of me subside,
Because you are a part of me,
My heart and soul,
You are to me,
We may not share the same bloodline,
But to me,

You are mine,
And I am yours,
Until the end of time I will be yours.

When you need me,
No matter how many days it’s been,
How many weeks,
Or months,
Or years long it’s been,
I’ll be here waiting,
My babies,
You will always be.

No matter how mature you are,
How much you think you know,
You will never know the love for you,
That is here forever in my heart.

The pain that fills my heart and soul,
The ache which penetrates,
Deep within my core.

Without knowing how you are,
Where you are,
With whom you are?
To hear you laugh,
To hold you when you need to cry,
To simply be there by your side,
How can I even begin to feel whole inside?

How could I possibly begin,
To describe the pain,
Of loving two things so unbelievably precious,
Only for them to be taken away,
No contact,
No communication,
No knowledge of how they are?

No words would give this pain it’s justice,
No torture would stand to match,

I know I’m in no way perfect,
I know I’ve made mistakes,
For this I’m so very truly sorry,
But I hope one day you realise this,
We are all just human beings,
We learn from our mistakes,
That’s not said to excuse them,
It just helps us,
Not to repeat those same mistakes.

No parent anywhere is perfect,
Me included,
But the love of a mother,
Through blood or not,
Is the strongest love that ever was,
There is no end,
Until my very last breath,
You will be my unconditional loves,
Whether you’re aware or not.’

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